I wish I were always a squirting artist...

I've been thinking lately of the painful process of creating. It can be fun, and most of the time it is, but it is also something that may draw a lot of energy out of one's self. The other day after spending hours working on a couple of projects, I suddenly felt washed out, and SORE. My body was aching everywhere. The reason why it is so I think I know: during this creative process, that is not unlike gestation, you direct all your concentration and energy towards trying to squeeze the best out of yourself. Some days it is a painless, exhilarating process, you just ooze of creative juice, you squirt it out alla prima, so to speak. Other days it's just like giving birth to a baby that is taking its time, you push, squeeze, and nothing or almost comes. Or something comes but you've been on it for so long that you don't know any more whether it is good or bad. You're just too exhausted to know. I have developped somehow some sense of getting to know when to stop though, at least to let the canvas sit, and do something else. The congas I installed in my workshop are extremely helpful for that. When I'm squeezed out I just drum for a while and it usually helps, since it seems to disconnect me from what I was working on, and as drumming connects me with my "cave woman self", it usually brings mental images, and then I'm ready to get back to work on the project. Going out helps too. Have a walk. Look around. Have a mental conversation with myself. My main problem as an artist is that till recently I painted when I felt like, that is when it was painless. I decided if I wanted to evolve I needed to WORK, work a lot. Aie-Aie-Aie! Merde. My other problem is that I want to be good, very good, in every thing I do; and that days have only 24 hours. Aie. And that I love everything I do, and even more. I want to do more. AND I also want to LIVE. Aie. Quite a challenge. How to quench that thirst?